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Invisible Illness

    Depression and My Major Mood Swings

    Depression and My Major Mood Swings


    My depression has been worse than it’s been lately.  The least little thing sets me off, being alone most days all day gets me thinking too much and then when someone comes home I don’t want to talk to them.  More so if the question is. “what did you do today or what’s for dinner?”  Seriously, how are you?  How’s your pain and nausea levels?  Do you even want to eat?  A point of reference, I don’t eat much anymore and it has to be very bland and only a few things that I can eat.  As my depression ebbs and flows, I don’t feel that I can write.  I feel even more lost in my thoughts.  It doesn’t help that simple tasks have me finding that I’m having more and more memory issues.

    For the past few weeks, I’ve had a day here and there that the depression was worse or something made it worse and what was a good mood turned into me being a bitch.  I’ve lashed out at my best friend, who I miss with a vengeance and fear we will never be close again.  I’ve lashed out at my kids together and separately and said some mean things. Last night I lashed out at hubby and the kids.

    Last night I lashed out at hubby and the kids. Click To Tweet

    I’m home alone with the pupalups most days.  My family has school or work and leave the house at all different hours of the day.  I get not wanting to talk to me first thing before they go to school or work as I’m not a morning person either.  I’ve made an effort to be in the living room and that’s part in parcel with my back issues and sleeping on the couch.  I’m in the family nerve centre and only my husband talks to me and sometimes it’s that dinner question.  Some days, getting a shower is iffy because if I’m too dizzy I don’t want to try when home alone.  I’ve had too many falls lately.

    I just want my kids to spend a few minutes talking to me.  Tell me about your day, gripe about your day.

    I just want my kids to spend a few minutes talking to me.  Tell me about your day, gripe about your day.  I also want help.  I had to let the housekeeper go do to financial reasons and I can only do so much.  The company that is paying my long-term disability didn’t take enough or very little income tax off and it was a whopper of a bill that was due immediately. That bill had sent me into a deeper depression than I have been.  My one doctor keeps changing my appointments and he’s the doctor I really need to see.

    Pain and depression are closely related. Depression can cause pain — and pain can cause depression. Sometimes pain and depression create a vicious cycle in which pain worsens symptoms of depression, and then the resulting depression worsens feelings of pain.  Source:  MayoClinic.org

    I’m apologising to my friend, my kidlets, my husband and even my mother.  I’m sorry my depression has had me in a billion different moods.  I have no excuse for the way I’ve treated any of you.

    I am asking that if I ask you to do something in the house, please do it.  If I have to ask five or more times, then I’m going to lose it and yell.  No one likes me yelling but I shouldn’t have to ask six or more times to take out the garbage, cut the grass, bring a load of laundry up, clean your room, put your dishes in the dishwasher.  We all need to pitch in because I can’t do it all anymore.

    I’m in pain and you all know that but pain makes depression worse, worsening depression makes pain worse.  It’s an endless cycle.

    I'm deeply sorry to my family that I've hurt and my best friend who is going through her own battles and… Click To Tweet

    I’m deeply sorry to my family that I’ve hurt and my best friend who is going through her own battles and I compounded them.

    I can only try to do better.

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    Update on my But I Am Sick page …

    I currently have three autoimmune diseases and they are also invisible illnesses.

    I currently have three autoimmune diseases ... Click To Tweet

    Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis

    In 1994 when I was pregnant with my son I received my first autoimmune diagnosis for Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis.  I saw an endocrinologist when I was pregnant and then he dismissed me after.  I’ve only been under my family doctor’s care for most of the time.

    Type 1.5 Diabetes or Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults or LADA

    In April of 2012, I received a diagnosis of Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults or LADA as a short form.  I was first diagnosed as a type 2 but when I saw my new endo I was then told I was a LADA or a type 1.5 or a progressing type one. I had never heard of it but it’s the adult version of diabetes it just takes everyone a different amount of time for the body to kill the pancreas. I am currently on three different pills to control diabetes and have been begging for insulin for about a year now.

    Lupus

    In November of 2014, I was finally diagnosed with Lupus SLE.  It had been three years of feeling like I have the flu. No one test or person is the same with Lupus and mine seems to not like my liver. I get only a faint butterfly rash on my face and it comes and goes.  I’ve had times where I’ve slept for two days straight and taking a shower means I have to nap afterwards sometimes. I’ve been delayed being put on Plaquenil because of the liver issue that isn’t an issue.

    Fibromyalgia

    This is my Rheumatologist’s catch-all for my other symptoms.

    Chronic Pain

    I have chronic pain in my whole body.  I have it really bad in my joints from lupus and fibromyalgia.  I’m currently undergoing some nerve therapy shots to my back, hips and SI joints.

    Chronic Migraines

    My migraines have plagued me since I was in my early 20’s.  I got my first one about a month after a bump to the back of my head.  To this day my migraines still occur in that spot.  I’ve written a blog about the story of my migraines.  My current treatment is receiving Botox.  You can view that here.

    But I am sick, a diary of my invisible illnesses …

     

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    The Total Protection Package by ImmunizeLABS Review

    The Total Protection Package by ImmunizeLABS Review

    “I have been given this product as part of a product review through the Chronic Illness Bloggers network. Although the product was a gift, all opinions in this review remain my own and I was in no way influenced by the company. ”

    Before I was selected ImmunizeLABS had several questions for me about my health, what were my illnesses, what were my symptoms before I was selected to try the product.  I think that this in itself is a reason to trust in this company.  They didn’t want me trying a product that was not right for me.  ImmuizeLABS started out of trying to figure out what was wrong with Christine.  Like a lot of us, Christine had been diagnosed with  CFS/ME (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome / Myalgic Encephalomyelitis).  Her Husband Pascal set out to find a way to cure Christine and how their products were developed and you can read their story here: https://immunizelabs.com/pages/about-us

     

    Our health is the most precious gift we have and is our responsibility. The best way to avoid doctors,… Click To Tweet

     

    Once I was accepted, I was sent my sample package very quickly.  The bottles were packaged very well and all arrived safe and intact to me.  I received Kit 2 The Total Protection package, which included two bottles of Pain Relief, one bottle of Boost and Shield.  This is a 30-day supply.  The bottles did not need refrigeration.

     

    Total protection that includes:

    • pain and inflammation prevention
    • immune system boosting to fight infections and recover faster
    • cellular boosting for disease resistance and added energy
    • 1 Month supply of Pain and Inflammation protection (2 Bottles)
    • 1 Month supply of Shield immune boosting protection
    • 1 Month supply of Boost cellular health boosting protection
    • $30 discount
    • Free shipping
    • $250

    These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure disease or illness.

    *Always consult with your healthcare professional before starting any supplementation program, before taking or stopping any medication, or if you have or suspect you might have any health problem.

    Source:  ImmunizeLABS

     

    I had been ill in that I was very nauseous as with most days of my illness so I waited to start taking the regimen.  The instructions were simple, take two tablespoons of Pain Relief and a tablespoon of Boost and Shield first thing in the morning with 4 ozs of water.  (Somehow I missed that I could take it with apple juice)  To start you only need to take a teaspoon and build up to the recommended dose over the first week.  The smell of Pain Relief turned my stomach more than it usually is in the morning.  I had to take just the Boost and Shield together.  None of the products I tried needed to be refrigerated and that is pretty awesome in a product that has no added sugar, no artificial ingredients, no GMO’s, no soy, no dairy, no nuts and the only added natural flavours are organic cocoa, stevia, cinnamon oil, and ginger oil.

    Did it work?  I really can’t say.  I’ve been taking Boost and Shield and I haven’t gotten whatever the nasty bug is that my family has been plagued with.  I have lupus and I catch everything and anything I catch can cause complications.  Did I not catch it because I’ve been supplementing with Boost and Shield?  I hope so.  Two of the three people in my home other than me have had to go get antibiotics for whatever the bug is they have.

    If ImmunizeLABS could come up with a caplet form of the formulas then I would be able to take all the formulas.  I think that once there are other flavours, as mine was chocolate, their products will appeal to wider range of people. As someone who has taken way too many prescription medications in my lifetime, a chance to try something that is natural and good for my body instead of synthetic and chemicals is an honor to try.

    If you are interested in trying any of ImmunizeLABS products yourself, please check them out and KRISTIN10 will get you a 10% discount on any purchase until June 1st, 2017.  Also, shipping is free on orders over $200. 

    Journey with me … mini2z

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