Uncertainty

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IMG_7522   UNCERTAINTY

Uncertainty was the word that spoke to me today.

un·cer·tain·ty
ËŒnoun
  1.  the state of being uncertain
  2. something that is uncertain or that causes one to feel uncertain

I have had one autoimmune disease for almost twenty one years.  I’ve had so many ups and downs with Hashimotos Hypothyroidism that I can’t even begin to list them all.  There is a list of over 300+ symptoms of the illness on Hypothyroidmom.com and you can check it out here  http://hypothyroidmom.com/300-hypothyroidism-symptoms-yes-really/

I did my research and fought to be put on a Natural Desiccated Thyroid (NDT) with my endocrinologist.  Had I not done my research I think I would still be on a synthetic medication that was not working for me.  Once I changed over my body became a total mess.  I’ve always caught every cold, flu, stomach bug that goes around. It’s hard to tell if I was sick from the thyroid or another bug.  After a six month change over my thyroid levels have been good.  There are several different blood tests that need to be done to see if you’re getting the right medication.

Three years ago I developed diabetes.  There is very little in my family and I was at first told that I was a type 2 diabetic but that was quickly changed to a Type 1.5 or LADA which is Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults and my endocrinologist calls me a progressing Type 1.

All through these changes in the last three or four years I’ve felt like I’ve had the flu.  You know, you have a fever, your whole body hurts and you sleep a lot basically you feel like.  My temperature would fluctuate between 99.8 and 101.2 everyday.  This was the beginning of my Lupus and Fibromyalgia journey but it would take years to be diagnosed.

Not knowing what has been wrong with my body has caused me so much uncertainty that I try not to think about it or I will cry. Actually I’m crying now just writing this blog post.  I’m off to another doctor’s today and there is so much uncertainty with everything.  I never know if I will wake up and if it will be a good day (very few of those) or if I will be confined to my bed or maybe just maybe I can make it to the couch in the living room.  Uncertainty is my life with these invisible illnesses.

Journey with me … mini2z

©mini2z

©mini2z

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  • I want to give you a hug, but I realise that wouldn’t make you well. On top of that your job is at risk. t my support group we say “This too shall pass”, but that doesn’t really cut it in this case. Neither does “Chin up!”
    All I can really say is well done for completing this assignment, feeling as you do. Maybe it helps you to write about it.
    I hope thigs somehow improve for you soon.

  • Mini2z, you are carrying a great “uncertainty” regarding your health. I am sorry for your pain. I believe, however, that you are a person who can show great courage and be an inspiration to others. I will see you more in writing101.

    • I’m happy to have answers even though it is lupus and fibromyalgia I thought I was crazy for so long that I was always sick.

  • Thank you for visiting me at mini2z ... Journey with me and I hope to see you often xx

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